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Dating safely.

Effective November 1, 2026oysterme LLC

Read this before your first tap. What oysterme does and doesn't do to keep you safe, and the habits that actually protect you.

The short version

  • We don't run criminal background checks. A verified badge is an ID match, not a safety guarantee.
  • Meet in public, tell a friend, get yourself there and back.
  • Never send money or tickets to someone you haven't met.
  • Block, report and pause are always one tap away.
  • In danger? Call 911 first, report to us after.

01What oysterme does and doesn't do

oysterme does not run criminal background checks on members or visitors. We don't screen anyone against sex offender registries or criminal records. A "verified" badge means a government ID matched a selfie. It does not mean a person is safe, and vouches are other people's opinions that we don't check for truth.

What we do: every profile is 18+ by stated date of birth, messages are checked automatically before delivery, hurtful senders are warned and then banned, your Dating page never shows your last name, employer, phone number or address, tap links expire after 24 hours, and you can pause, hide, block and report at any time.

This page is also our safety-awareness notice under the laws of states that require one, including New York, New Jersey, Illinois and Texas.

02Before you meet

  • Keep conversations on your terms. You never have to give your number. Someone who pushes for it, for money, or for anything you've declined is showing you who they are.
  • Do your own homework. A quick search of a first name and a photo takes two minutes. A FaceTime date before meeting is built in for a reason.
  • Never send money, gift cards, account details or travel tickets to someone you haven't met in person, no matter the story. Report anyone who asks.
  • Protect your details. Don't put your address, workplace, kids' school or daily routine in photos, prompts or voice notes.

03At the date

  • Meet in public, somewhere busy, for the first few dates. Not their place, not yours.
  • Tell a friend who you're meeting, where, and when you'll check in. Share the plan from First Date Prep.
  • Get yourself there and back. Keep control of your own ride.
  • Watch your drink, and know your limit.
  • Leave if it feels wrong. You don't owe anyone an explanation. Walking out is always allowed.

04Events and venues

Events and spots in Out tonight are run by other people. We list them; we don't host them or sell their tickets. Confirm details with the organizer, buy tickets from the organizer's own site, and apply the same rules above. If an event looks wrong or doesn't exist, report it and we'll pull it.

05If something goes wrong

  • In danger right now? Call 911 (or your local emergency number) first. We can't help in real time.
  • Report the person from their page, from any message, or by emailing safety@oysterme.co. Reports are read by a person. We may ban the person and, where appropriate, cooperate with law enforcement.
  • Block them. Blocking stops them from opening your page again or contacting you through oysterme.
  • Pause your page if you want a break from everything. Your band and QR code show nothing until you turn it back on.
  • Sexual assault support: RAINN, 1-800-656-4673, rainn.org. Domestic violence: 1-800-799-7233.

06Reporting a safety concern about oysterme itself

If you find a security or privacy problem in oysterme, email privacy@oysterme.co and we'll respond quickly. Please don't test it on other people's accounts.

Questions?

Email safety@oysterme.co. A real person reads it, and we answer privacy requests within 30 days, usually much sooner.

Read our Community Guidelines →